Author Archives: Chanel McLeary

I don’t know about you but I’ve seen some pretty life giving and life changing content on various platforms and even in person events or just a good word from friends.

But what I’m seeing in response is different from many years ago.

I see people saying they really enjoy the talk, food, atmosphere in the room, encouragement, the support but they didn’t let the main person (who did something helpful or gave a encouraging word) or the staff know how it impacted or added to their day or life in a positive way big or small.

That, video on YouTube which changed how you work or came at the right time when you were lost.

That person who made a lovely cake, everyone clearly ate every last crumb. But was thankfulness directed to the person who made it?.

Are we forgetting to encourage others and give credit where it’s due?

I love to make an effort when I see someone serving at the checkout struggling with their day. To smile at them and say how are you?, or I hope the rest of day gets better. Seeing how they change and feel up lifted.

Encouraging those we come into contact with changes the world it may feel small but even a small fire can burn down a big forest. Our words have impact, our encouragement has impact.

A small fire of encouragement, a like, thumbs up, smile could actually send ripple effects through our families, friends, communities, small business, colleagues, companies and world.

People you come into contact with should feel the spread of just a simple gentle encourage exchange, it could change there day in ways you wouldn’t imagine.

Small business are often struggling whilst building the company just a review that takes 10 minutes could make the different in ways your never imagine. If they’re good tell them.

If you received exceptional service send a email to the organisation thanking them or review.

Your neighbours child completed something and got an award. Put a ‘well done note’ through their door.

Let’s light small fires of encouragement everywhere. Leave notes on buses of encouragement.

There’s so much negativity all around us and challenges. Imagine you change the life of someone who just needed that word today who felt like giving up. A timely word is powerful.

Chanel x

Whilst we’re working towards a goal being content in the present moment is equally important.

We shouldn’t be living to far (in our heads) into to the future neither the past.

Being content is different from comfortable. In fact people are often uncomfortable with the idea of being content. It makes them feel like maybe it’s some kind of defeat in accepting their current situation.

Honestly it’s not that, being content allows you to rest in the place you’re currently at and appreciate the things you currently have before your current goal is reached.

Learning to be content with a little is equally important as being content with a more.

It gives us a lens of gratefulness rather than lack. Which having a lens of lack will always play heavy on our minds and if your working towards anything it will feel ten times harder. Decisions will be made in haste because lack creates a sense of urgency.

Contentment is not accepting our current predicaments, its recognising this is where I am right now and that’s ok. I can work with this until my breakthrough comes.

Enjoy the small and big things. Enjoy the waiting, Enjoy the little things in the everyday. Enjoy the slow moments.

Be present.

Be content.

Chanel x

What happens to us from birth until now that rocks confidence. My dad left the family home when I was around 6 years old. From there things went left for various reasons.

The relationship I thought I had with a dad I adored was no longer there. It was up and down for years after that.

Fast forward and I have come to realise losing our confidence makes us lose courage.

The mistake I made was putting my confidence in a person, yes it was my parent but never the less making them responsible for my future happiness is dangerous.

Making anyone responsible for my happiness is dangerous.

I see so many people who we’re once courageous and going for things, lose themselves when they allow others to live rent free in their heads.

Get therapy, a coach, talk to a friend or someone you trust. Anything to break free from the negative aspects of people who have dimmed some of our stars.

When our light from one of stars are dimmed we lose the light guiding our path.

What Courage is NOT-

•Having it perfect before progress

•Being free from fear

•Needing others to hold your hand

•Needing everyone on board

•Guarantee of success

What courage is-

•Doing it afraid

•Doing it alone

•Do not need permission from others

•Doing it with a small bit of confidence (it will grow the more you step out)

•Knowing nothings perfect

•Mistakes are life lessons

There is no perfect condition and a person can only have an effect on your confidence if they’re given permission too. It may sound easy but it’s not and it takes work.

Deciding to not let another person or situation have anymore of you’re confidence is deciding to live again.

If we’re constantly living in the past we’re not living for today. Decide to live again.

When we live for today we find confidence, then courage to tackle the things we wish to carry out. We are able to focus on the now and things that need to be done.

Looking to the future we want to see.

Be courageous even in the small things.

Meet new people, love again, start a business, meet up with friends, accept your kids going off to college or uni, travel somewhere new, pick up a new hobby, sell up and move aboard, change career, go dancing.

So much things that require courage that might seem small to some but actually is big to you.

Walk into courage……

Courageousness lives here.

Chanel x

Success is twenty percent skill and eighty percent consistency.

Consistency is the foundation for being committed.

When we commit to something we make a decision to see it out, until the desired result is reached.

But to get the desired result we need to be consistent in the things we do everyday towards it.

Consistency comes in many forms but one thing is key, repeating the same tasks towards your end goal over and over again. It requires focus and sacrifice.

Sometime it’s doing things you could do without that seems tedious or boring. Actually it’s very necessary to the process.

Giving up to soon is something we see in society now, with it’s almost slot machine mentality. Companies like Amazon or streaming services where one click can trigger an instant or next day delivery. It’s no wonder it’s hard for us to get our heads around consistency when we want instant results.

Any person who is very committed to a task or working towards something will tell you it’s not the absence of issues or setbacks but it’s the grit and consistency that has helped them to get to the desired finish line.

They were and are committed to the process.

Being committed drowns out the outside noise, disappointment, setbacks, feeling of giving up and the rest.

Because when these times come just like in marriage or parenting there is always teething problems but you’re in it for the long hall. Exploring ways to improve or work at things.

When you take a posture of being a commitmented person to the things that truly matter. You also know when your hearts not truly in it and make plans to leave that situations.

If someone is not committed to many things this will only leave you confused because it leaves you thinking is it just me bailing out again.

So taking a commited posture ensures you’re put your heart and soul into those things you want to see change or gain.

If you’re unsure why you struggle to commit it’s probably time to think about why that it is. It maybe a pattern throughout your life or you could just be in a place of exhaustion.

There are so many reasons way and this is something to be explored, and to work through. Overcoming these limitations can in fact help you to pursue you’re endeavours again.

Is it time to get recommitted?

Chanel

How do you view your work and personal life, do you show compassion and charitable behaviours towards those who are already, or come into your life even when they’re good or challenging?

In the UK (where I live), I am noticing a lack of charity and compassion towards others both personally and outwardly.

Now this can be for a variety of reasons for instance, in the workplace someone dislikes their job, the customers are known to be demanding, it’s a fast paced environment leaving little time for customer interaction. Whatever it is compassion is being lost in some facilities between the workers and customers alike.

In the way of personal life these can cause a disconnect leading to lack of compassion like stress, workload impact, lack of help and support, mental or physical illness and finances. These and more can impact one’s compassion and charity. Both personal and work life can bleed into each area causing a in balance.

Now, we’re not talking about people who are abusive or controlling.

We’re referring to the everyday people we come across who may or not be challenging, both could equally do with some compassion or charity.

It’s worth noting we ourselves can also be challenging at times, we may come across as intense, not be charitable when it’s in our power to help and lack compassion toward others.

The Act of charity

The act of being charitable is giving something away without expecting a return just doing it out of kindness.

If we’re honest we come away from some places doctors surgery’s, places of worship, retail shops, supermarkets, online customer services, online or local companies which can lead too feeling disheartened.

Compassion is low.

Charity is low.

If we notice we are dissatisfacted with life these can contribute to part of the equation.

Are we Compassionate

Are we compassionate and charitable to our friends and family?. At times we can struggled in this area. A quick response to a conversation because were tired or not connecting not realising the person asking may need abit of support. Only to feel like rubbish later for not responding better. It’s a learning process and we can work on making ourselves more present moving forwards.

I had a thought the other day, why do most of us give gifts on birthdays and Christmas mainly. Why not give people random gifts throughout the year?. Or volunteering our time or make a meal for someone who is struggling?.

Our healing journey is not always about us just searching for a correct path way. It can mean showing care and supporting others.

I’ve done this and seen others do this. They chose to help others in encouraging ways and they themselves became naturally encouraged in the process. They continued to do it even when their struggles and after their situation got better it’s great to look outside of ourselves too. Different perspectives.

Now, don’t get me wrong there is a time and a place to retreat and have alone time.

*With compassion and charity some people on the receiving end can manipulate these things so be cautious. But…. I’m hopeful you will know the right way proceed forward and how to help.

In your place of work, school, family, business, neighbourhood, even whilst you’re talking to customer service agent. Try to have compassion on the people around you even if they come across difficult.

I like to think when people go low we go high.

We don’t need to go down to their low level of rudeness. We can be both firm, direct and compassionate.

In your business, when sending an item to a customer could you send a free complimentary gift or taster?. Write a personal note to them just saying ‘have a lovely day’.

We don’t know the power and impact we have on others. Just a little encouragement can help others, grow us, build connections and make a difference to our hurting world.

We have two choices in this life and you may hear me say this another time-

The two choices are, we can do good or do bad in this life. Let’s create a world whereby the choices we make reflect the world we want to create around us.

It’s catching too.

Spreading goodness,

Chanel x